I assume by now that everyone has heard about what’s going on at Penn State.  I assume all of us have heard of yet another kid coming forward, making that 9 victims that Sandusky allegedly molested. I italicize allegedly because, I mean, c’mon — dude did it.  Not a doubt in my mind.  Not a doubt in anyone’s mind.

I assume that the whole situation makes you as sick as it does me.

Maybe this sounds silly, but as the mother of a boy, my path feels a bit easier.  There are so many obstacles for girls to overcome and it there seems to be so many things to be afraid of for them.  But with a boy, it seems I mostly just need to keep him safe in all the general ways, I need to teach him how to treat people (girls in particular) with respect, and I need to make sure he doesn’t become some sort of thug.  I mean…that’s pretty much it.  Oh sure, it’s not that simple, but those are the broad strokes.

Yet something like this shook me to my core.  I fully intend to have Mac involved in sports.  I come from a football-fueled family.  It’s something that is important to us and at times, has even defined who we are.  I wouldn’t think twice about sending Mac to some camp at a respected University led by respected coaches of a respectable program.  As a parent, I’d have no reason to think anything would ever happen to my son in that venue.

But something like that can happen.  And to an extent, the machine of college football let it happen.  Joe Paterno KNEW about the molestation and did only the bare minimum of what was required of him to put an end to it.  I can’t even wrap my head around it.  Nor can I wrap my head around the fact that other coaches and janitors WITNESSED the molestation and did nothing about it.  I mean…I’m….I’m….I’m speechless.  As a parent — especially the parent of a little boy — it makes me sick. 

I sent my dad an email yesterday asking how I could continue supporting college football (I long ago gave up on NFL football) when the machine of college athletics is what let someone like Sandusky continue having the opportunity to molest young boys.  Because of how powerful football is, everyone involved put the welfare of the institution above the welfare of a child.  9 children, to be exact.  Well…9 for now.  How can I cheer for any team knowing that something like this or any other number of scandals can be going on behind the scenes?

I’ve been trying to gather my thoughts about this whole thing for the last couple days.  To write an intelligible post about how scared I am for my child and other helpless children.  To write about what a scary thing it is to blindly trust others not to harm our children.  To write about what a disappointment it is to watch a hero fall.  I don’t know how to put into words what a crushing blow this whole fiasco has been for me.  I don’t know how to properly convey how it absolutely shook me to my core and has made me sick to my stomach.

For me, this incident is the icing on the cake.  Never has it been clearer that it is time for college athletics to take a long hard look at what they’ve allowed themselves to turn into.

I’m done.  I’m done cheering for teams who make shady deals in order to get the best players.  I’m done cheering for teams who don’t hold their players accountable and allow criminal behavior to go unchecked.  And I’m certainly done cheering for a team that allowed a sexual predator to roam free.