It makes me sick to write this post.

Yesterday, I received word that the 16 year-old son of a former co-worker (more than simply a co-worker — a friend and mentor) killed himself Sunday afternoon.  The reason given for the suicide?  Bullying.

Bullying is one of my great fears for Mac.  I’ve seen first-hand the scars that bullying can leave behind.  My immediately younger brother was bullied throughout his life, but especially in high school.  Being a bitchy and self-centered older sister, I didn’t truly appreciate or care what he was going through, but I’ve seen how the cruelty has shaped him and it isn’t fair that any child should have to go through that.  And I feel terrible that I never did anything to prevent what he was going through (it seems I was a bit of a bully of a sister).  I will never forgive myself for not stepping in.

I don’t know why bullying seems so much worse now, though.  I suspect it’s because it’s ceaseless.  It isn’t just happening at school anymore.  It’s via text messages, IM, facebook — there’s no respite from the attacks.  And it can happen covertly so oftentimes it can go unnoticed by family and teachers.

The effects are quite obviously devastating.  And I’m terrified that one day Mac might go through the same thing.  I don’t want to be facing the same tragedy as my former colleague is, 15 years from now.

It needs to stop, and as parents — hell, as responsible citizens — we can stop it.  I’m reminded once again of how critically important it is to teach my child compassion and kindness.  To teach him not to make snap judgments about people and to embrace the differences in others.

I don’t want my kid to get bullied, but I also don’t want him to be a bully.  Hate is a learned action, and I certainly don’t want to be the teacher of hate.

If you’re looking for resources on bullying, StopBullying.gov is a great site for parents, teachers, and kids.  It gives advice on recognizing the signs of bullying, helping your child through being bullied, and what to do if your child is the bully.

Bullying is preventable, so please, join me in helping to put and end to it and preventing another senseless death.  The fact that I’ll be attending a funeral for a 16 year-old boy this week all because of the cruelty of others is completely unacceptable.